Mister Benson's Dumb-Assed Accidents

    During the course of my life, I’ve pulled a lot of stupid stunts.  I was the tired old cliché of a kid thinking he was immortal. Granted, some of the incidents were not my fault, but most were because my stupid ass thought I would be okay. I surely gave both of my parents grey hair, but they are a strange breed of cat. Dad was a Navy guy who spent a lot of time in country in Vietnam and saw many people hurt. My mom is a tough chick whose had Multiple Sclerosis since 1972 and has been pretty much wheelchair bound since 1979. Needless to say, my boo boos had better be good.
    In fact it was this attitude about injury that carried over to me and kept me from being worse off than I was. I never went into shock. I was always worried about my mom being worried, or my family being unable to pay the doctor bills. But most of all, I was worried about my dad being mad. He would make the most horrible threats to where the doctors even were scared, but they were never carried out. It was the simple fear of my father that more often than not kept me from going into shock.
    Anyway, here is a little summary of the carnage:

    What is really funny is the fact that since I joined the Navy, I have taken some pretty bad falls. Falls that would have injured me when I was a kid, yet I havn't broken a bone. Life is pretty weird.

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